It's Simple

Idle Worship

It’s important to have inspiration, but it’s even more important to know the difference between being inspired and imitating someone. Every rational person should question the judgement of their idols.

There is an easy trap to fall into. As soon as you forget that your muse is fallible, you’re in trouble; and you’re worse off. The point of having these inspirational influences is to help you build a positive characteristic. None of them would want you to model yourself after them completely, so don’t try to.

Don’t cut your hair exactly like they cut their hair. Don’t talk exactly like they talk. Don’t act exactly like they act. Don’t live exactly how they live.

Absorb what is useful, discard what is not, add what is uniquely your own. — Bruce Lee

Contrived, but I like the message. An ad by Martini called “Luck is an Attitude”.

Get Your Sleep

I honestly used to think that I need to learn to sleep six hours a day so that I can have more time to be productive. Then I’d wake up feeling like shit, unable to stay focused and I’d spend the entire day on Reddit. Weeks of this nonsense.

Recently, I came across this post by David Heinemeier Hansson aptly named “Sleep Deprivation Is Not A Badge of Honor” and he changed my mind. Everything he said in that post was true, and I was too stubborn to see it.

I was stuck in the “all the Silicon Valley heros don’t sleep, I want to be like them!” hole, and fighting my nature. I can’t work properly on six hours. I just can’t, I’ve tried. If you can’t either, stop trying. Get the sleep you need. Smarter people than me are telling you to.

For what it’s worth: it’s never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit, start whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people who have a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of, and if you find that you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again.

—Benjamin Button in “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button”

Life on Autopilot

I just read a paragraph of a book and I have no idea what I read, even though I wasn’t distracted. I listened to a lecture and heard every word, yet I don’t remember or understand anything. I know I made dinner last night but I can’t remember what it was. Am I brain-dead?

It wasn’t always like this, at least I don’t think so. So when did I become so unengaged in my surroundings? Life on autopilot. One of these days I’ll absent-mindedly cross the road and get hit by a car, like a horse with blinders on.

Zen philosophy teaches us to be ever-present and mindful of ourselves. When you’re eating an apple, be aware of the apple; when you’re sweeping the floor be aware of the sweeping. Don’t let entire months go by on autopilot. Question why you’re doing what you’re doing. Otherwise, what’s the point?

It’s easier said than done (most things are) - how do you remind yourself to focus if you thought you’re focused in the first place? My plan is to leave myself little reminders. I used to mark a little x on my hand, and I’d see it every so often and I’d remember to get back on track. I’m going to make the same little x on my whiteboard, and in my notes, and on post-its. Maybe eventually focus will never leave me at all.

The Cult of Done Manifesto

I wouldn’t say I agree with everything there, but it’s a very productive philosophy to say the least.

Tell Me Who Your Friends Are

And I’ll tell you who you are. In a past post I said that we owe it to ourselves to surround ourselves with people and things that inspire us. People and things. I’ve also talked about your friends having an innate tendency to bring you down if they think they’ve figured you out. Tricky.

This entire notion of a person being the average of their closest friends is a blanket statement, but the sentiment is right. The people you deal with on a daily basis have an immense amount of impact on your life. Human beings are mimics by nature; we absorb and process the personalities around us all the time. Sometimes we don’t realize it. Sometime we realize it, and we’re disgusted that we’re turning into so-and-so that we don’t like. Whoops. Then we recoil.

This seems like a callous (or maybe even heartless) notion, but sometimes people need to be cut out of your life. Some people are just toxic. They’re bringing you down. Recognize when the people around you are poison, and their influence is constantly making you a worse person. Minimize your interactions with these people.

I’m not saying you should become a hermit; don’t abandon John Doe because he ate your last bagel. Common sense still applies.

Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self esteem, first make sure that you are not, in fact, just surrounding yourself with assholes.

— William Gibson

Bufr Overflow: You Are the Average of Your Five Closest Friends.

bufr:

I won’t name names, so we’ll call her Jane.

Jane’s five closest friends are two engineers at Google, an engineer at Eventbrite, an architect, and her father (which is so cute), who is the president of a national soccer team in Jane’s home country.

Jane graduated with a degree in Business…

A List Apart: Articles: Habit Fields

An interesting article talking about Habit Fields - zones and places that encourage certain behaviours. This falls nicely into my post about contextual personality, and is worth a read.